Wednesday, April 4, 2018

Do Super Beta Prostate pills come with steak knives or hearing aids?



I'm dealing with the radio verson of this commercial on XM Classic Radio every few minutes, so now you have to too.  You're welcome.

The radio version really targets the middle-aged, asking again and again if they're "frustrated" that they have to "pee so often."* The announcer uses the word "pee" so much I'm surprised he doesn't break into snickering and giggling at some point in the ad.  Is the word "urinate" hard to pronounce?  Do the makers of Beta Prostate think that middle aged people won't know what it means?  Or do they think midde-aged people will giggle appreciatively at the word "pee" too?

Anyway, on to this product, which I guess is endorsed by Larry King (as if that means anything- what over-the-counter miracle "medication" ISN'T endorsed by Larry King?)  It's all about the symptoms, people, and this stuff "may" be effective in dealing with those symptoms.  You can get it by calling a toll-free number or going online, both of which are a lot easier than making an appointment with an actual doctor who might give you an examination and maybe, you know, find the CAUSE and treat THAT.

Which might be significant.  Because problems with the prostate are no joke.  I seem to remember that there's a form of cancer involving the prostate- what was that called again?

But never mind that.  What you don't know won't hurt you.  Be like the idiots who pop two Aleve a day, every day, to deal with regular, nagging pain.  Or the "this is nothing if I treat it like nothing" living-in-denial dopes who wrap copper around their aching knees.  If you don't go to the doctor, you can't be diagnosed with something serious.  So stay away from the doctor and stick with home "remedies" like this crap.  Keep handing Larry King your money.  Those trophy wives don't come cheap, and the divorces are even pricier.

*In case you wanted to give credit to XM Radio for picking its commercial spots wisely, I am also constantly assaulted with ads for Channel 43, which sounds like a very loud modern "music" channel targeted to angry illiterates in the 16-25 range, so there's that, too.  I'm sure devotees to Classic Content Radio will rush over to Angry Oppressed Millionaire Rap Channel 43 as soon as Life with Riley and Lux Radio Theater is over.

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