Tuesday, June 27, 2023

Evie, Ethos Life, and an annoying family preparing to die

 


So Evie is some kind if insurance genie or sprite waiting to pop into existence whenever two stupid shlubs mention the possibility of purchasing life insurance, I guess?  

Fat idiot is inexplicably standing in his own living room drinking a cup of takeout coffee and eating a pancake with his bare hands while standing perpendicular to his wife and children (wife is standing perpendicular to the children, because this is what people do, I guess.)  Nobody looks like they are doing anything other than filming a commercial, which of course is what they are doing.

Evie the Insurance Pixie shows up, flips her hair in slow motion to let us know that she's Evie the Insurance Pixie for Ethos Life, and lets the stupid parents know that they can buy life insurance without any health exam which is the first concern of the fat schlub parents because they are obviously unhealthy fat schlubs who aren't interested taking care of themselves and therefore really need life insurance.  

In seconds, this guy can use his phone- which has magically appeared in his hand to replace the pancake he dropped on the floor in reaction to Evie showing up- to find out how much money he can leave his dependents if/when he drops dead of a heart attack, probably while stuffing something unhealthy into the cake hole under his nose.  Happy Ending for his family, happy ending for this commercial, happy ending especially if he's considerate enough to have that heart attack at work and not in the living room. 

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