1st Advantage is to borrow from Peter to pay Paul

 

Gee, I can't imagine how this woman built up a big credit card balance- she seems to spend her money very sensibly, and really seems to be living within her means.  

In all seriousness, though- she took out a debt consolidation loan to pay off her credit cards, and now she's off doing this indoor skydiving thing, which according to a quick Google search generally runs between $50 and $80 for two one-minute sessions.  In other words, she went right back to being stupid with money.  Her VISA card had a zero balance from the time it took her to complete the debt consolidation loan to the time she could book two minutes of indoor skydiving which she calls "more important things" than the interest rate on her credit card which she is back to using. 

I understand that there's a certain personality that is on some level "addicted" to debt.  These are people who can't bear to have zero or low debt and who respond to diminishing totals on the credit card statements with impulse buying.  Paying down debt is such an established part of their routine that they feel kind of lost when there's no balance to stress over.  Maybe this woman is one of that type.  Or maybe she's like 99 percent of people with high credit card balances and is just incapable of managing her credit like a rational adult, or like 100 percent of people in debt consolidation commercials who act as if they won the lottery when they take out a loan to pay off another loan.  Either way, this is both stupid and weird. 

A few questions for State Farm after viewing one of it's moronic Batman/Bateman Commercials

 

1.  So someone in Corporate really thought Batman/Bateman was clever enough to be turned into a series of ads, huh?  Well, after the results of last November I guess I can't blame them- we are an exceptionally stupid country that likes to breathe out of its mouth, so....

2.  Glad to see Jake from State Farm doing anything that isn't stalking Pat Mahomes, I guess.  I have no idea why he's actually in this ad- he has nothing to do in it- but come to think of it, he has nothing to do in any of these ads except give us that smarmy smirk and not sell insurance.

3.  Who in State Farm thought that it would be a good idea to reference what is not only universally considered the worst Batman film of all time but acknowledged as perhaps the worst SUPERHERO movie of all time and one of the Worst Movies of All Time PERIOD?  Nobody in their right mind wants to be reminded of The One With Poison Ivy.   Is this about making us miss Pat Mahomes, or what?

Who are you going reference next, State Farm?  Howard the Duck?  

Audi's Four Rings of Despair "Legacy"

 

These are among the most expensive LookAtMeMobiles on the market, despite having terrible ratings when it comes to regular upkeep.  There's a reason why they are such popular lease vehicles; you can generally expect 2-3 years of problem-free driving before the thing starts to fall out from under you and becomes more intimate with your local repair shop than with the driveway you liked to show it off from. 

Basically, Audi presents a legacy of gaudy cars and gaudier ads littered with buzzphrases like "state of the art technology" and, most hilariously, "quattro all-wheel drive" ("quattro" means "four." You're telling us that this car has four-wheel drive.  "Quattro all-wheel" is just cringey redundancy on a whole new scale.  What else does it have?  Post-Viewing Rear-view mirrors?  Locking Security Doors?  Global Positioning GPS Location Finder View Screens?)

And of course the comment section is filled with comments like "this commercial made me cry" and "best commercial ever" and "I can't wait to sign up for seven years of payments of $1500 a month for the next Audi," etc.  Because bots are a thing and people are really, really dumb.  Dumb enough to buy Audis, even.  

Crowning the King of Depreciation Nation

 

I love reading the comments on this piece of garbage, even though I assume that 90 percent of them are from bots or paid endorsers making a nickel a post.  Of all the SUVs out there, none depreciate in value faster than the Rav 4, and the only way I can think of making this a bigger money pit is by producing a Hybrid Plug-In Model.  

Ok, maybe if it was a straight EV it might be worse.  Either way, you had BETTER like your Toyota RAV 4 because there was a reason the dealership pops champaign whenever one drives off the lot; these things are ridiculously overpriced credit busters that will leave you underwater faster than Jack Dawson after dropping Rose on top of that raft.  Here's a tip:  If you really like these things (and there's no accounting for taste, after all,) lease it and keep the mileage low enough to trade in without penalty when the term expires.  That will give you three years  to develop some sense and maybe even some of that taste I just said there's no accounting for.  I mean, come on- these SUVs are not only marked up to the freaking moon, they are ugly as hell.  It's not a Subaru Solterra- it costs more- and it's not a Nissan Cube (nothing is more painful on the eyes than a car that says "aerodynamics isn't a thing") but it's still an eyesore capable of dropping property values.  If you get one, at least try to keep peace in the neighborhood and keep it in the garage during daylight hours.

This SPAM Commercial is another canary in the coal mine....

 

In case you didn't know, sales of SPAM rise whenever the economy is doing poorly.   They are economic indicators like the spread of Dollar Stores and Pawn Shops.  And when you see actual commercials for SPAM you know that Hormel has its finger on the pulse of the American psyche; we are in trouble, and we know we are in trouble.  Time to stock up on processed pig meat product that can sit on the shelf for years as we fight off roving bands of laid-off tech workers or zombies, or laid-off zombie tech workers.

In the meantime, "served with a side of friends" sounds uber-creepy to me.  Did the guys who came up with the ad campaign for Nutrific write this?

Earnin lets us know: We are in big, big trouble

 

After watching this ad, I feel kind of guilty for ragging on Klarna and AfterPay.  I mean, those are terrible "services" that just encourage people to overspend and pretend that they have more money than they actually have.  But Apps like Earnin aren't terrible.  They are downright scary.

I mean, come on.  If you find yourself getting excited about the opportunity to "get paid" (take out a payday loan, get a cash advance, however you want to call it) every day, your economic situation is so precarious that I really hope that's a comfy, roomy car you have because it's probably where you're going to be living in the near future.  Does Walmart still allow overnight parking?

I'm not trying to be mean here, but Oh My Dog are in trouble if you are in constant need of your paycheck days before it's due to hit your bank account.  I don't know if Earnin is better or worse than using a credit card as a bridge to that next payday, and I wonder if it- like Klarna and AfterPay- has as its target audience people who don't HAVE credit cards.  I don't even know how to find out.  I just know that this is really sad.  Unless of course the reason why you find yourself running short of funds is because you're addicted to Uber Eats and Starbucks in which case you can go to the devil in your own way and I have no pity on you.  

The Woman in this Safelite Auto Glass Commercial...

 

The way she reacts to a crack in her windshield makes me worry about how she might deal with a real crisis.  What would she do if her transmission broke down?  Or, beyond car problems which will always pop up, how about an illness in her family?  Being laid off from her job?  A partner saying goodbye and filing for separation or divorce?  Does she go postal and start shooting up the neighborhood?  Does she throw trash cans through plate glass windows?  Does she start a Tiktok account to share her trauma with the universe?

Simply put, I think it's pretty clear that this woman is not ready to Adult quite yet.  I don't want to be in the car behind her when her Check Engine light goes on if she gets this unhinged over a cracked windshield.  Heck, I don't want to be in the same neighborhood when she sees that the Oil Life is down to 20 percent or that the tire pressure is slightly below optimal.  This woman makes crystal look like Tungsten.  I'm legitimately worried about her.