Sunday, February 17, 2019

Disgusting Scraping the Barrel Febreze Commercial reminds us that we are held in infinite contempt by advertisers

You can't smell Dave's farts.  That's it.  They don't smell, for some reason.  They never did.  And everyone noticed that they don't smell and everyone celebrates that fact, from Dave's parents to the would-be trophy wife who wasn't good enough for the guy whose farts didn't stink.  Even the janitor mopping the locker room has fond memories for Dave, and I don't even want to think about why he's remembering Dave's odorless fecal release as he's mopping the locker room floor. 

Sigh.  Yeah, we get it.  We got it ten seconds in, yet you gave us another minute and a half of this nonsense.

Because, you see, the people who are coming to your Party to Watch the Patriots Win Again aren't Dave.  They are going to stink up your bathroom.  So you'd better get Febreze.

Meanwhile, Dave doesn't even know what Febreze is- and since he can't read and continues to live with his mother well into his twenties, he asks her what it is.  His mother would know, being a girl and all.  WTF-ever, Febreze.  I can't help thinking that this commercial was made exclusively for the glue-sniffers at YouTube to LOL THIS IS HILARIOUS I LOVE THIS BTW WHAT IS THAT SONG crowd, but even they didn't jump at bait THIS obnoxiously obvious.  That's something, anyway.

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