Sunday, February 10, 2019

Teleflora's disturbing "Love Out Loud" commercial



The main character in this ad spends his entire life vainly attempting to buy love with flowers.  Over and over again, he goes to flowers as a way of getting girls- and then women- to acknowledge his existence.  At first, he's dissapointed to discover that while the objects of his affection like the flowers and are willing to accept them, they aren't instantly enamoured of him personally.  His world is bright for one moment as the girl smiles and appreciates the gift of flowers, and then turns away without offering him any kind of reward beyond the thank-you. 

As the boy was clearly after more than a thank-you, this leaves him confused.

As he gets older, he continues in his quest to purchase a relationship with a fistful of pretty plant life.  At some point, he finally manages to get a woman to go out with him and even move in with him, but as she learns who he is beyond his ability to buy flowers she begins to (gasp!) quarrel with him.  Yes, this incredibly ungrateful woman actually ARGUES with the Very Nice Guy who used to be a Very Nice Boy, clearly she isn't good enough for him and she walks out, leaving our Hero Alone Again, Naturally.*

Now our Very Nice Guy has turned into an Old Very Nice Guy, and the world is very dark and cold and filled with Evil Women who simply cannot appreciate him no matter how many times he's shelled out for flowers.  He's done with all that; he's not buying any more of these Users flowers because they never get him what he really wants.  But oh wait- here's an equally dissapointed and Twice as Desperate old woman willing to give HIM a flower because SHE'S been let down by people with personalities and their own ideas of what they want in a life partner.  True love at last.

Our story closes with the main character married at last to the right person- someone who, like him, believes that affection can and should be purchased with trinkets (flowers today, rings tomorrow) and that there's Hope Yet for all the Nice People in the world who know they are Nice People because Look What I Did For You Now You Owe Me Dammit. 

The only thing more creepy, sad and disturbing about this ridiculously smarmy, ugly, manipulative little nub of an ad?  The YouTube commenters weeping with appreciation over it.  Ugh, people.  Please.

*yes, that's an intentional Gilbert O'Sullivan reference.

1 comment:

  1. The artwork should be by Lynn Johnston; that's because The Nice Guy has Blandthony Caine's MO and he ends up with a reasonable facsimile of Lizardbreath Patterson.

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