Saturday, May 7, 2022

Allstate joins the assault on Working from Home


Remember that whole series of nasty, anti-Work from Home commercials Apple dumped on us at the height of the pandemic?  It was called "The Outsiders" and it focused on a group of unmotivated slackers determined to cheat their employer out of productive hours by doing as little work as possible from their home "work stations."  

Well, I guess that Corporate America isn't quite done trashing employees yet, because here's another Lazy Good For Nothing Cheater Living High on the Hog at his Company's Expense commercial, this time from Allstate.  

Look at this guy.  He's got a substantial house with a swimming pool (and a faux Roman statue for decoration, nice subtle touch there, Allstate) which he's enjoying by sunning himself while pretending to be on a Zoom call.  Since he seems to be the host of the call, we can assume he's making more money than any of the other participants, but again, just look at him:  He's not paying any attention to the call.  He's not working.  All he cares about is his tan and his pool and (inexplicably) the fact that he's saving 25% by bundling home and auto insurance with Allstate.  This guy needs to get back to the office where the ceiling cameras can keep an eye on him, am I right?  This is what happens when we let the most productive workers in the world good for nothing slackers "work" from home- they will totally take advantage of their Saintly employers.   You know, like they did during that so-called pandemic that only existed to The Former Guy from his rightful office.

The message is clear:  American workers are worthless unless they are being carefully supervised.  Left to their own devices, they'll cheat the system and smile while doing it.  Working from Home is a necessary evil during lockdowns and all that, but it's time to get back to Normal, which means it's time to get back to rush hours and offices and the 9 to 5 (but keep your phone on before 9 and after 5, there's money to be made after all.)

*for sure, I'm a 25% savings away from having all this.  Sure, I am. 

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