Sunday, May 29, 2022

Progressive, Jurassic World, and a lot of stupid crossover garbage.


Seems like every other commercial I've seen over the past few days has been some stupid Jurassic World crossover like this one, and I'm sure that with two weeks left before the latest Look at the CGI Dinosaurs summer blockbuster opens it's just something I'm going to have to get used to.

This one pretends that Progressive sells Dinosaur Damage insurance, which is about as believable as a commercial featuring people at a drive-in (and watching 1960s-style "let's all go to the snack bar" intermission ads.)  See, it's FUNNY because there's carnage and people screaming (and presumably being eaten off-screen, because if you've seen any of these stupid movies you know that the only thing dinosaurs ever did was attack and eat anything that moves, all the time.  Maybe that's why they became extinct- they were simultaneously exhausted and obese.)  So you should buy Progressive Insurance because look they spent big money trying to make some lame connection with a movie which, by the way, you should go see as soon as it opens.  And then go back to see several times because you've got so much money burning holes in your pocket.)

All would be forgiven if we saw a T-Rex gulp down Flo with one bite.  And then cough her back up because hey, dinosaurs have standards. 

1 comment:

  1. It's like comparing different brands of fizzy sugar water. All insurance companies behave as if you're planning on gutting their kids with a meathook if you do something cruel like make a claim so it makes no sense to distinguish one from the other.