Friday, March 29, 2024

Nobody is "alive" in this Xfinity ad


Trigger Warning:  Boomer Rant Coming Up!

When I was a kid, any "streaming" involved wading in the local creek.  If I walked through a dark house and saw everyone in my family lying around, it meant that everyone was reading or listening to music.  If everyone was in one room, we were probably watching tv together.  Note that last word- together. 

Now we get "what a time to be alive" from a dead-eyed kid wandering around a house noting that every single person in that house is becoming a potato while staring at their own personal glowing screen.  I'm not at all sure why any of them are in the same room- they certainly aren't interacting.  Hell, they are barely breathing.  Nothing must interfere with the inert consumption of whatever is on those screens.  

For some reason, this commercial is supposed to appeal to the people who pay the bills in houses like this and encourage them to make it possible for their families to "enjoy" a level of "accessibility" offered by the ad.  Because it's an amazing "time to be alive," we should be spending as much of that time splayed out on couches in dark rooms wasting our youth, encouraging our brains and muscles to atrophy.  Truly a triumph of the modern age- not high-speed broadband, but the successful marketing of such a loathsome product.  

Put that junk down and go outside, you ridiculous numpties!

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