Saturday, February 28, 2026

The Split Pay by Rent App is both terrifying and depressingly predictable

 


It's basically AfterPay for Rent, except that I'm pretty sure that AfterPay for Rent already existed.  It's in line with proposals for 50-year mortgages and the ever-lengthening car note (which will average 7 years in 2026, up from 5 two years ago and 3 twenty years ago...)

And how does this even help?  If your rent is $1000 a month (you must be renting that room Patrick Swayze lived in outside of Jasper, Missouri in Road House) and you can split it into two payments of $500 every two weeks...what does this do, exactly?  You still need $1000 a month.  Who has $500 every two weeks but not $1000 a month.  Oh, right- people who are absolutely horrible at managing money.  Like "if my rent is not due for 28 days, I'm going to spend that money before I can write a check to the landlord."  This app is created for people who know they are stupid children with money who cannot be depended on to pay their predictable, scheduled bills despite having predictable, scheduled paydays.

I'd love to see the correlation between people who use this- um- "service" and the people who use one of those apps that "pay" (lend you) your salary by the day because budgeting between paychecks is suddenly Too Difficult Because Reasons, Probably Because of those Boomers Who Ruined Everything.  I bet it's really high.  What odds can I get, DraftKings?

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