Friday, April 17, 2009

Magic Johnson Is Shameless

"A big-screen tv. Stylish furniture. A bedroom set."

Why is Magic Johnson doing inventory? Because "Rent A Centers help you bring your dreams within reach."

Sheeesh, didn't you make enough money in your NBA days, Magic? What compelled you to sign up to be a shill for Rent-A-Center?

First of all, there's simply no way that you've ever walked into a Rent-A-Center. Magic Johnson doesn't patronize stores that specialize in renting crappy furniture to people with terrible credit who are so desperate to deny their own financial situations that they are willing to sign contracts obligating them to pay $80 a week for three years for a 60-inch color tv or (as I read in a Rip-Off Report post, $33 a week for 63 weeks for a Playstation 3.) Magic Johnson doesn't rent bedroom sets that have been rented by five families previous. Magic Johnson doesn't rent.

And what are these "dreams" that Rent-A-Center promises to bring people closer to? The dream of owning nice things? Um, no. More like the dream of being able to pretend to own nice things, while you sink further into debt. The dream of being admired by your neighbors who didn't notice the Rent-A-Center truck in your driveway, and hopefully wont' notice the RAC collectors banging on your door when you are late making that $28 weekly payment for the recliner with the built-in fridge you "had" to have, or the $42 weekly gouging you decided to stop making because you woke up one day and wondered why you had already shelled out $800 for a microwave that retails for $169 at Best Buy. Some dreams.

Hey, Magic- I don't think people really "dream" of paying loanshark-worthy interest rates for junk they will never even own. Why you decided you needed an extra paycheck enough to lend your good name to these bloodsuckers is really beyond me.

What's next? Michael Jordan for Payday Loans?

1 comment:

  1. THIS IS FUCKING HILARIOUS. This is by far the worst video that Magic Johnson has ever appeared in.

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