Thursday, November 22, 2018
A Quaint Kohl's Black Friday Commercial
If you're under ten years old, you probably don't remember when Black Friday started on.....Friday. That is, the Friday morning after Thanksgiving. At around, say, 9 AM or so.
And if you're under six years old you probably don't remember Black Friday starting at Midnight on Thankgiving, as this woman is singing about. After a day of cooking, cleaning, hosting, and being with friends and family, she's wide awake, fresh, and first in line to get into Kohl's to take advantage of all the awesome sales that are regularly available from On The Brink of Bankruptcy Kohl's on the internet every single minute of every single day. Because it's fun to be in a parking lot at midnight, I guess.
And of course nowadays there's no real start to Black Friday anymore- Kohls opens it's doors at 5PM on Thanksgiving, which I guess gives lunatic shopaholics more than enough time with that family and those friends, Hey It's Been Fun but there's money to be spent so Bye Everybody I'm off to the anachronistic mall to get stuff I could get online but It's Just Not the Same There's Something to be said for Tradition After All. And I guess 5 PM gives all those workers enough time with their families as well- I mean, sure, a 5 PM opening probably means that most of them have to be at the store by 3 PM to set up, but heck how much time does it take to say you're thankful and eat and chat with loved ones? There are consumers to be catered to, after all.
I think I'll look around for a Prager U video explaining to me how Black Friday is a celebration of Capitalism which means it's a Celebration of America which means it's an Affirmation of G-d's Existance, because this whole Black Friday thing is really getting me down. Well, have the happiest Thankgiving possible anyway, people, for however long it lasts.