Well, I guess one smartphone company decided that adding another camera or making its product slimmer or removing the earphone jack just wasn't a stupid enough "improvement" to justify another rollout to the Always Eager to Spend to Hell with Retirement Funds masses. So instead, we get what I really hope turns out to be the dumbest gimmick ever (yes, even dumber than that phone which could project images on to a wall so that you could show everyone the new Avatar trailer. Remember that one? What was that, ten years ago? I think it was more than that, actually.)
This phone- um, "folds." Not in the cool way that the old phones did which allowed you to pretend you were on Star Trek trying to contact Scotty to have him beam you up (everyone did with flip phones, not just me. Everyone did. Shut Up.) But in a really really stupid way which I guess features a flexible (not at all delicate, of course) screen which is a valuable upgrade Because Reasons, those Reasons being People Will Notice Your Cool Phone.
I hate everyone in this ad. I hate everyone who had anything to do with this ad. I hate everyone who is commenting about how much they love this ad and love this phone (because I know that nobody commenting that they love the phone actually owns one.) Most of all, I hate the Western World for being this Stupid. Come on, people. There's got to be more to life than falling for shiny electronic trinkets like this. I can guarantee you that there's a lot more to life than BUYING these shiny electronic trinkets. But I can't guarantee that there's more to YOUR life, because I don't know you. I just know I hate you.
If mankind survives, this sort of thing will be visual shorthand for how decadent our society had become.ReplyDelete