Wednesday, September 22, 2010

If I cared how it tasted, I wouldn't order a Lite Beer; thanks for asking though

There are several of these nasty little bites of crud disguised as advertisements for Miller Lite out there, but this one pushed the wrong buttons for several reasons.

First- we have the super-hot bartender who behaves like no bartender who wants to keep her job- and the tips coming in- ever would: she openly mocks a customer. What exactly does "do you care how it tastes?" mean, anyway? I would be taken aback by this question, and maybe we can give the guy a pass for answering "no I don't care." I mean, I'd assume that it was a joke. I just ordered a Lite Beer. You are a bartender. I kind of expect that even if I don't specify a brand, you'll give me a beer you think tastes pretty good. You know, because I'm a customer, and all that quaint shit.

Second- "When you put down your purse and start caring, I'll give you a Miller Lite." Fucking Excuse Me? Who asked for your opinion of my wardrobe, beer monkey? Know when you are going to give me a Miller Lite? When I ask for one. Which btw, will be never, because why the hell am I drinking light beer anyway?

Third, in response to "it's a carry-on," the bartender doesn't quite seem to know what to do with her empty skull- "no, it's not" comes out of her lips, but she shakes her head in the affirmative. What the hell? It's bad enough that you've created an argument with a customer, lady. What's with the "no" answer and the "yes" headshake? What's with the attitude? My money not green enough for you?

Naturally when the guy gets back to his "friends" with his beer, he's treated with condescending derision from all of them, including the Token Black Guy Who Must Appear in Every Beer Ad Featuring More than Three Males. Naturally.

Miller Lite seems pretty determined to give State Farm and NFL Direct a real run for their money when it comes to producing stupid, nasty, insulting commercials. With this string of Hot Judgmental Bartenders ads, I think they might just pull it off and win the race to the top of the steaming heap of putridness the commercial landscape has become. I'd just like to see a real bartender try to pull this crap and keep her job. I don't how cute this woman is; act like this in the real world and you'll be filling out an application at Hooters the next day.


  1. Who ever orders a beer and doesn't know what brand he wants? Or goes to the store for a pack of cigarettes and doesn't know her favorite brand?

    Everyone has a brand preference or they wouldn't use the product.

    Hell, I know from my convenient store manager days that most customers have a first choice, and know which second and third selections are acceptable if the first one is out of stock.

    In addition, when it comes to any product that a person is expected to put in his mouth, he certainly cares how it tastes -- beer, soda, food, cigarette smoke, toothpaste.

    The whole notion of ordering a "light beer", not naming a brand and not caring how it tastes is ridiculous on its face.

  2. The only people I can think of who would do something like this are the dicks who say "Surprise me" when asked to make a choice about anything. It doesn't matter what the thing is, Mister Gutless Shmuck says that he has no opinion on anything.

  3. I agree; however, I would still argue that the bartender has no business treating him like something she just scraped off her shoe. She's an employee, he's a paying customer- if you can't treat the customer with respect, you need to find yourself a new job.