Sunday, May 7, 2017
I love you're Commercial's, Grammarly! They makes me feel so smart's!
"Let's suppose you're writing a resume for a job you really, really want. Or that you're writing a Facebook post that you want all your friends to see. Or a research paper you just have to get an A on."
"Now let's suppose that you have all of the English skills of your average injured box turtle, pretty much never pick up a newspaper or (God Forbid) a book or magazine, and have been taught how to read by texting and tweeting."
"Let's continue by assuming that you always managed to get someone else to write your essays for you, but now you're out of High School and that someone else is long gone and for the first time, you find yourself face to face with the reality of a world in which you can't ask Siri absolutely everything and people are actually asking you to physically do something all by yourself."
"Well, no problem- here's Grammarly, a software program you can quickly download (ask Siri how) and let fix all those holes in your education which involve basic spelling and sentence structure. And because you live in a world where asking an inanimate object how to turn around in your own driveway is perfectly normal, you won't feel even the tiniest sliver of shame while you use it. Yay Modern World!"
"So go ahead and use Grammarly to pretend to be more intelligent and articulate and capable of expressing the most basic of concepts without the help of an artificial agent. Hey, it worked for Lilly- she was hired for the job of Social Media Manager in that other Grammarly commercial over applicants whose brains weren't atrophied bowls of pudding!"