Sunday, July 16, 2017
Real Rubes, Ruining my summer by "starring" in Chevy Commercials
Just do a quick survey of YouTube comments and you'll see that Chevrolet's "Real People, Not Actors" series is among the most loathed in the history of commercial buffoonery. Chevy's response, clearly, is to just ramp up the jaw-dropping dumb by putting the pathetic mouth-breathing "I'll say or do anything for a few seconds of facetime on tv" Real Idiots into increasingly absurd, forehead-slapping situations.
Check out this latest chunk of stupid, accredited to Valley Motors or something which I guess is just one of the 3500 or so local Chevy dealers in the United States where you can see one of these dull crapmobiles for yourself. One of the Real Shameless Not Actors squeals with delight because she's test driving a Chevrolet on a racetrack, something she'll never be able to do once she buys the car but figures that won't matter because taking Brady to soccer practice will feel just like being on the Nascar circuit. Another refugee from a nearby Trump rally gives us the obligatory "WOOOO!" as he uses a Totally Unnecessary But Satisfyingly Compensating pickup to- umm, climb some obstacle, for some reason. Never mind that he'll be using that $40,000 toy to haul garbage and couches and groceries over speed bumps and will never, ever encounter anything like this obstacle in real life. As for the guy who wants to "head to the Chevy dealership as soon as he gets home," well, more power to you, buddy. I don't even care that you're blatantly brown-nosing Chevrolet to get yourself on tv because when you've sunk as low as this, what difference would my dissaproval matter to you, you pathetic nothingburger?
The really bad news is that there's absolutely nothing different about these ads except for the word "Summer." These look exactly like the ads we saw all last fall during the baseball playoffs and then during the NFL season. And there are always Chevy sales events going on- always. Just like there are always people ready to chirp valentines to Chevy in exchange for 2 seconds of "hey look at me I'm on tv" validation. Man are you people sad!