Friday, September 15, 2023

BK's "Hunger Hack"


1.  Eating something is a "Hunger Hack?"  Wow, it must be the original hack.  And why is it called a "hack" at all?  Oh right- because the cool kids don't say "quick fix," they say "hack."  And Burger King is cool, yo.  I mean, they don't even refer to themselves as "Burger King" anymore- it's BK.   Because initials are cool, too.  

2.  Eating what "BK" laughably calls "food" isn't even a quick fix for hunger.  Anyone who eats the ultra-processed sludge being dished out by fast food places knows that the sludge stimulates hunger, it doesn't alleviate it.  But a lot of people don't know that it's designed to stimulate hunger and make you come back for more.  And more.  And more.  Nobody ever got rich making food that satisfies hunger, after all.  Plenty of people however continue to get very, very rich making food that leaves the consumer unsatisfied, and addicted.

3.  "You Rule!"  Who, me?  Why do I rule?  Because I followed an artificial "craving" to your garbage pail disguised as a restaurant and gave you my money?  Well, thanks very much, I guess.  You Suck.  You Suck really, really hard.  Royally, even. 

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