Saturday, January 9, 2010

Worst. Segue. Ever.

"If you don't think leaks can be a big problem, you've never taken a trip with your grandfather as he acts like a test pilot for adult diapers."

Old Man Voice: "(groaning) Houston....we have a problem!"

Ugh, ok, a couple of things straight off. First, are we supposed to be amused at the thought of grampa on a car trip, struggling with his own incontinence? Second- "Houston, we have a problem?" Next to "we're not in Kansas anymore," is there any hackneyed, long-since-ready-for-the-scrap-heap cliche out there? Does anyone actually make any effort at ALL when writing commercials, screenplays, etc. anymore?

But wait, it gets much worse. Turns out, this commercial has NOTHING to do with bladder problems, automobile trips, or dead-horse throwaway eye-rolling cliches. Because next thing we hear is "at Dura-Lite, we take leaks seriously. We are experts in providing Charge Air Coolers for all your trucking needs..."

Good freaking lord, I wish I was kidding. We got a lame joke and old man groaning that he's in the process of wetting himself as a set up for a product that (I guess) is used to stop leaking in your truck's air cooling unit. They both involve "leaking." Get it? GET IT?

Here's what I get: The makers of Dura-Lite either hired the "B" team to write this dreck, or they decided "hey, all commercials sound alike anyway, how hard can it be to write one?" and did it themselves. Either way, it was a bad decision, because what they end up with is a juvenile piece of rubbish that barely touches on the identity of the actual product (I had to look it up online, and after a quick glance at the website I'm STILL not quite certain what is being sold here.) If in fact the product stops air coolant leakage in trucks, that's fine- but how the hell does that rationally and logically connect to grampa wetting his pants in the car? I mean, is this really the best you can do?

If so- would you buy a "Charge Air Cooler" from people who listened to this commercial, said "yep, go with it, we want our product associated with this?"

1 comment:

  1. No, sir; no, I would not buy an air cooler from people that God-damned out of touch.