Friday, August 7, 2015

Three days later, someone's bloated corpse washes up on the beach, and the investigation begins

Personally, I think this guy should drive that SUV into the ocean and get this over with.

Failing that, however....

Is this guy used to being berated about taking the garbage out?  If so, why is he so damned happy about it?

Why is this woman thanking him for taking the garbage out?  Does he thank her for doing all of her chores?  And why is she so damned happy about "needing to talk?"  "Needing to talk" is never good news and is never anything to smile about.

Why is this woman so damned happy about applying for a Medicaid Supplement Plan (or Insurance or something- I don't know.  I don't care.  I just know it's not worth that Check Out My Dentures Smile?)  Is she on serious drugs, or what?

"Did you do your situps?"  Jeesh, lady- he looks like he's a retired man in his 70s who has enough testosterone to go kayaking, and enough money to own his own kayak which he can strap on the top of his SUV All By Himself, or at the very least with your help.  Situps?  He's about to row around in a kayak.  Is he in training for a triathalon?  It's not like you're asking if he took his heart meds or blood thinners.  He's about to row a freaking kayak!  Maybe he doesn't need to do situps today!

The guy responds to his wife's declaration "I think we need to look into spending more money" with a "right now?"  But we don't get an answer from the wife.  Next thing we know, she's moved on to nagging him about his situps.  So, did they get on their iPhone and order the extra coverage?  Or did they just agree to have this talk at a more appropriate time- like, when the guy isn't driving his SUV or getting ready to row a kayak?

Personally, I'd be a little worried if my spouse suddenly mentioned the need for more insurance just before we went out kayaking.  I wouldn't turn my back on her, that's all I'm saying.

1 comment:

  1. Her thanking him so profusely for taking out the garbage is really ugh. It's like "He's a man, so in order to make sure I don't sound like a nag, I have to heap lots of praise and thanks on him every time he does the smallest little chore around the house." Sheesh.

    Maybe she's asking if he did his pushups because it's supposed to help him be in good condition to paddle the kayak, but if she was trying not to sound like a nag, well, that didn't help. All in all, she comes across as the kind of long-suffering, passive-aggressive wife who indeed might do something like be found an hour or so later crying to the local police, "It was horrible! One minute we were paddling along through the whitewater, and the next minute the kayak had overturned and my husband was gone!"

    I'd definitely wonder about that if I were him.