Saturday, July 14, 2018
I have no idea why Southwest keeps assaulting me with this
Seriously, this ad is running during every commercial break- sometimes twice- sometimes TWICE IN A ROW- of tonight's Red Sox v Blue Jays game. And I'm pretty sure that no matter how many times it hits me over the head, I still won't understand what exactly is going on here.
I mean, I get the message. Southwest has high consumer satisfaction ratings. Great. Cool. Whatever. I won't even point out that judging one airline against another in consumer satisfaction is like looking for the tallest dwarf in Narnia these days. Everyone hates the airlines, and for good reason. All the domestic carriers suck. Each and every one. The internationals? I have very limited experience there, but no complaints from me.
What I want to know is, what are these stupid grinning idiots grinning stupidly about? They don't look like they sit on the Board of Directors at Southwest. They look like stewards and baggage handlers and maybe pilots. What are they getting so excited about? And why are they incapable of showing excitement in a realistic, relateable way? I mean, Jesus- they look like they just won the freaking lottery, not that the airline they happen to draw a paycheck from is more popular than an airline they DON'T work for. Why does it matter so much to them?
I guess it's probably a good thing that I have never been asked to fill out a customer satisfaction survey by Southwest. The only time I ever used the airline was in June, 2017 when I had to fly to Tampa. The flight was fine. I liked not paying for my bag. But man oh man did I hate the "pick any seat" strategy. At least a dozen people in front of me on the line to board the plane were lying about their boarding numbers and cutting in front of people who should have been ahead of them. Then I get on the plane and NOBODY wants to sit next to ANYBODY- you walk down the aisle and get surly "well I guess you can sit next to me IF YOU MUST" looks. Very awkward.
Assigned seating, Southwest. It's not that hard. Get on it, will you? And until then, please tell me what the hell these people in your commercials are on, because I want a bottle of it myself.