Thursday, August 27, 2020's bizarre "Am I Cute" ad

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Original commercial here:

1.  "Am I cute?"^  Right up to the moment you opened your mouth, maybe.  Then "cute" went out the window, replaced by "cloying," "insufferable," "cliche'd," etc.  Hey, Mom of this child?  Congratulations on getting your kid into the world of Kid Actors.  Now please get her out and allow her to have a life.

2. "I mean, look at these dimples." I would, if there were any.  The person who told you to say that doesn't know what dimples are- apparently, he thinks it means "child cheeks"- or figures the audience doesn't know what dimples are.

3.  "Look at mom and dad over there, cleaning on a Saturday instead of playing with me."  You mean, cleaning that big suburban home they chose to purchase.  A home that 99 percent of the population of the planet would die for.  Oh, and "Saturday," as in "Weekend?"  A totally bizarre concept for billions of people who labor seven days a week for food and shelter.  Your parents are keeping their Western Palace clean.  #firstworldprobs.

4.  The "solution" to this kid's "problem (which is that her parents are not paying enough attention to her on a Saturday)?  Hire someone who DOESN'T live in a suburban McMansion or make six figures to clean their palace so the owners don't have to.  Someone who very likely has children of her own who will wonder why THEIR parent isn't around to play with them on Saturdays.  Those kids don't count, of course, because they aren't as white as this kid, plus they probably don't even have dimples. 

*for a moment, I thought this might be an ad for a kid seeking child care and was thoroughly creeped out.  Seriously, kids, do NOT advertise for babysitting services by asking prospective employees to comment on your "cuteness."  And anyway, what is this kid saying- her parents should be free to play with her because she's CUTE?  Does she feel rejected because she isn't good-looking enough to play with?  So much unsettling weird here.

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