Sunday, August 30, 2020

Probably my favorite As Seen on TV piece of nothing- the "HD Antenna"

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Original Commercial Here:

Tired of massive cable bills?  The average American spends more than two million dollars a year just for access to television signals!  And what if you HAVE cable and you want to set up a second TV in another room?  Well, you COULD spend $10-$15 million on a contractor to rip down a wall, set up a cell tower, or have the Evil Cable Company come and install a new box- and then you're right back to THROWING YOUR MONEY AWAY just for the pleasure of watching Your Favorite ChannelsTM.

Instead, for just $10 plus Shipping and Handling, we can send you a flat piece of metal and plastic which is basically just a fancy-looking coat hanger to plug into the back of your tv.  That's it!  You pay for it ONCE, and you're DONE- doesn't that sound better than two million dollars a year for cable?  Just plug on this coat hanger---err, HD TV Antenna, and you'll get ALL your favorite channels (assuming that your favorite channels are the local ABC, CBS, NBC and FOX affiliates, Retro,  Grit,  JumpTV and any number of networks featuring nothing but Spanish-language soap operas.)  All in GLORIOUS HD (assuming you actually own an HDTV, of course.)

Now you can watch the Big Game on TV.  You can also watch the pre-game show before the Big Game.  You can watch the stuff on before the pre-game show that has nothing to do with the Big Game.  You can just watch tv whenever you want is what we're saying. 

Just check out this awesome commercial chock-full of photo-shopped images of people magically getting crystal-clear HD pictures on their TVs.  Wouldn't you want to be one of them?  Order Today- or save even more money by attaching a coat hanger, key ring, or pretty much anything else metal to the back of your tv.  But don't do that.  Just send me your money and I'll send you a piece of pointless junk that comes with a bucketful of nonsense claims, ok?  

1 comment:

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