Saturday, March 13, 2021

Wow Cups- For people who have little people, go figure


Or "When I don't feel like watching tv but do feel like because it's Saturday I really ought to do a post, go to an old As Seen on TV commercial."  Hey, this site isn't monetized, so if this kind of cheap cop-out annoys you, that's just too bad.  

Know another way you can avoid all these insane- and sometimes damaging (that's a LAPTOP right next to that cup!  I've watched enough tv to know that if there's ever a large container filled with liquid next to a laptop, that laptop is DOOMED!) spills?  Just don't have any kids.  Not only do you avoid 99 percent of all the spills that happen in an average person's life, but you also avoid college funds for people who aren't you, vaccines for people who aren't you, clothes, shoes and food for people who aren't you...and you end up a multimillionaire before you're forty years of age.  And you still have all your hair.

And guess what happens if you do have kids and you do get them these Wow cups?  Here's your answer- the kids will do everything possible to spill liquids out of those Wow cups.  Just take a look at what these little monsters are doing with their cups- they are drinking from them while hanging upside down on beds.  They are knocking them off of kitchen counters.  THEY ARE USING THEM NEXT TO LAPTOPS!  

(I have to admit, I do like when the little girl drops her cup and throws her arms down in frustration, like she's thinking "I am SO SICK OF BEING A KID AND HAVING TO DEAL WITH GRAVITY!"  She's awesome.)

Ok, whatever.  If you insist on having kids, you'd better childproof that once-quiet, once-clean house that used to be your quiet sanctuary from the kid-filled world with latches for your cabinets filled with delicious poisons, little plugs for the electrical sockets you forgot you had until you bought into the Must Have Kids meme, and Wow cups.  But I'll remind you that if you don't have kids, you can skip the Wow cups and all the rest and sleep stress-free on a mountain of cash, like I do, every single night.   Choose Wisely. 

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