Tuesday, December 14, 2010

A Delightfully Adult-Free Breakfast

There's plenty to hate on here. Check out dad, who at first glance seems perfectly happy to be eating his Honey Nut Cheerios all by himself in his raggedly Old Man Robe- except that he's got a perpetual scowl on his face, insists on angrily jamming his spoon into the cereal (looks to me as if he's bitter that it's not bacon and eggs) and basically acts like a man who is being forced to take his medicine.

Check out son, who for once in these commercials is actually justified in his clear disdain for Dear Old Dad, who in all honesty is acting like a lame drama queen here. Son is not amused by dad's whiny "this is for my heart!" or his "your mom will be crying over my arteries" (what does that even mean, anyway? It sure doesn't sound like Cheerios takes the heart-healthy attributes of it's cereal very seriously.) The "nice speech, dad" is a bit over the top for me- I can't imagine saying such a thing to my dad- but as I implied, this guy almost deserves it.

When the kid finally exits the stage, Dad goes right back to applying Cheerios to his mouth (seriously- it doesn't even look like he's EATING the stuff- just trying to put it away as quickly as possible, so he doesn't have to actually taste it.) The stupid cartoon bee shows up- why? The message of this ad, I think, was that Cheerios is a heart-healthy cereal. Which suggests that it was designed to appeal to adults. Even if the adults it's aimed at are as childish and weird as this guy, do they really need the added come-on of a cartoon bee?

Maybe. Considering that Cheerios makes a practically sugar-free version of it's product (it's called Original Cheerios) and that there are a LOT of cereals out there more "heart-healthy) than this Honey Nut crap, this guy might just need extra incentive to eat a cereal with slightly less sugar than Cap'n Crunch for the sake of his poor arteries. Maybe Honey Nut Cheerios is step three of his five step Heart Health Program- first eggs without bacon, then Cap'n Crunch, then Honey Nut Cheerios, then regular Cheerios, then Grape Nuts?

I'd hate to think of the look on this guy's face when he gets to the Grape Nuts. At least he won't have to worry about having to share it with anyone.


  1. I allow myself the illusion that I'm doing something healthy for myself by eating Chocolate Cheerios. They're not as delightfully chocolate-y as Cocoa Puffs, but when my doctor gets all condescending and asks what I'm eating for breakfast, I can say, in all honesty, that I eat Cheerios for breakfast.

    And sometimes lunch.

  2. I didn't even know there was such a thing as chocolate Cheerios.

    I've been replacing two meals a day with Grape Nuts for the last seven weeks; in that time, I've lost 22 lbs. So I'm kind of sick of Grape Nuts. Pretty healthy diet though.

  3. Well I say good job John on eating healthy, I've been trying to change my diet to healthier stuff, more water etc. I was doing OK when I had normal food but then I ran out and had to get Food Bank food, and some of it isn't as healthy for me as it should be. But, I have spinach which I need to eat some of now, so it's not all bad. I try to have smaller regular meals.

    1. thanks for the kind words, Jason- in the four years since this post I'm down 27 lbs from my original weight (giving up my car and walking everywhere really helps too.)