Saturday, April 26, 2014

Oh shut up, Martyr Mom

Here's some advice for this woman- when you nail yourself to that cross, bring a friend.  It's a pain in the butt to get that last spike in.

Seriously, lady.  You've got diabetes, but you've also got a husband and kids and a big house which means you are always on the go Doing Everything For Everyone Else so it's Really Hard to keep your blood sugar balance, blah blah blah.  So you guzzle these nasty milkshakes because you are just soooooo busy taking care of your family and keeping that house clean you selfless, forever sacrificing angel you.  Seriously, I can't believe two Saints are being added in Rome this week and we can't fit you in too.

Hey, look, stupid.  If you can't eat a balanced diet because you are married and have kids, you are doing a really crappy job organizing your life.  My mom had five kids and a job and she managed to feed herself- it wasn't that complicated, she was making food for her family anyway.  I think the idea here is that Joan of Arc is such a whirlwind of activity, packing lunches, playing chauffeur, and cleaning cleaning cleaning that she's basically decided that actually eating a balanced meal just doesn't fit into her schedule.  If that's true- lady, your schedule sucks.  You are doing it wrong.  And drinking Glucerna until you graduate to Ensure isn't anywhere close to the best solution.

I can't believe we are supposed to think this woman is even sensible, let alone worthy of admiration.  You are being a idiot, mom.  Get some rest.  Get some exercise that doesn't involve changing a diaper or packing a lunch.  Eat three decent, balanced meals a day.  This frentic "I can't stop and breathe 'cause I'm a MOMMMMMYYY so I must live on an expensive version of Slim Fast" is just insulting.

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