Sunday, January 4, 2015
Because G-d F--ing forbid you ever, EVER put that stupid electronic toy down
Well, thank goodness you never, ever have to be "disconnected" from your fellow techno-addled jackass friends, because otherwise
1. You might actually find yourself forced to have a conversation with the person sitting on the couch with you (the look on that guy's face says nothing other than "good lord, there has got to be something going on somewhere I can get in on and at least mentally escape this loser.")
2. Someone somewhere else would not be treated to your Way Too Important To Wait "hey, whassup?" call. (This must really make that other guy on the couch feel good about himself- his friend is hanging out at the house, they seem to be watching a football game- but he feels compelled to make an utterly pointless "hey, whassup?" call to someone else.*)
3. Grandma might actually have to wait to see pictures from the family trip she wasn't invited on - "hey grandma, here's a selfy from the gondola during our ski trip, did we tell you we were going on a ski trip? Well anyway here's a photo, so don't expect a call this week because this covers it."
*I was on Amtrak for all of fifteen seconds before the guy across the aisle from me made a "hey, whassup?"call on his cell phone. Within another thirty seconds I had my earplugs, earphones, and portable DVD player going. I used to read on the train. That's pretty much an impossibility now, since the jackasses with rocks in their heads simply can't bear to be alone with their thoughts for more than a few minutes at a time.