Friday, January 30, 2015

Weebly gives me faith that this will be another American Century

I mean, just think about it- Weebly is a website that allows us to take our very best ideas and present them in a winning way.  And what are our very best ideas?

Well, there's the Jumping Off a Cliff idea.  I've encouraged a lot of people over the years to take advantage of this option, but have been unable to sell it to any of them.  With Weebly, I expect that in a very short time I'll be seeing a lot of very deserving people hurling themselves off cliffs.  And more power to them.

And then there's the Egg-Shaped Ice Cube idea.  "The Ice Cube Has Grown Up."  A great slogan for a great product.  That's called Filling a Need, and Nobody- NOBODY- does it better than Americans.  That's why we're Number One even when some of the products we churn out look a lot more like Number Two.  And don't you forget- um, something.  The Alamo, I think.

"Why not put fried chicken in Sushi?" That's a question only an American would ask.  After all, please tell me what people on Earth have ever been better at taking something healthy and turning it into life-shortening crap?  Remember, we are also the people who invented the bacon-stuffed cheeseburger, the cheese-stuffed pizza, and the deep fryer small enough to take on camping trips.  Naturally the country that would inflict upon (errr, I mean, "introduce to") the world the Cheese and Special Sauce Sandwich using Fried Chicken Instead of Bread would be the one to put fried chicken in Sushi.  If we waited for the Japanese to do it, we'd totally miss out.

Hell, I'm not even going to mention the Cardboard Furniture bit.  At this point, that's overkill .

I just wish Weebly had been around when I started this site.  This site is a really, really good idea that doesn't get any traffic.  Weebly would change that.  Because please tell me what is needed more than good healthy snark aimed at what America really does best- produce stupid, pointless junk and then make stupid, pointless commercials which convince stupid, aimless Americans that it's all necessary?

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