Friday, June 12, 2020

National Tax Experts: COVID-19 is DEFINITELY an Opportunity...but for what?

Were you annoyed with paying taxes, because it reduced the money you had left over from your paycheck you had to spend on things you wanted?  In other words, were you sick of taxes getting in the way of living the lifestyle you wanted to live?

Are you now tired of "dodging the IRS" which is "hounding you" to pay the taxes you decided you just didn't wanna pay even though you knew those taxes represented your contribution to the society you live in and whose benefits you enjoy?

Are you willing to believe absolutely anything?  I mean, including a pitch that the COVID-19 emergency could be connected to a Get Out of Your Responsibilities Free card when it comes to paying your taxes? 

If all of the above is true, LISTEN TO THIS!......

"The Corona Virus has forced the government to take extensive actions (well, maybe- not extensive enough, and way too late) that might make this the most Opportunistic Time (well, that's a refreshingly honest way to put it) to Restructure or Resolve your tax debt."  And take a look at this pretty young couple, totally befuddled at the tax bills that Came Out of Nowhere just like that dog that ate her homework once, or that car that jumped in front of his in the parking lot when he was standing perfectly still while very safely trying to update his Facebook account.  They sure look like Innocent Victims, just like those Other Times. 

"You may have heard that there were tax filing extensions put into place as a response to COVID-19.  We hope that you allow us to make a nonexistent connection between actual tax filing extensions and 'aggressive new programs' that will allow you to restructure or even eliminate your tax debt.  You know, like you allow other companies to make the invisible connection between Medicare and Medicare Insurance Cards pitched by Joe Namath.  You're really good at hearing what you want to hear, after all."

"Act now before it's too late, because we all know that once this current Emergency lifts we'll be right back to pointing out entirely generic 'troubled times' in these ads and we won't be able to use a specific, actual Emergency anymore.  But let's be real- we're going to be able to milk this thing for years.  That's why we used COVID-19 and Opportunistic in the same sentence, after all."

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