Sunday, July 19, 2020

Casper- the Audi of Mattress Entitlement



Ok, I've seriously never cared about anything less than the fact that this band of entitled suburban twats have new mattresses which will make their already-perfect lives even more perfect.  The fact that Patriarch of this tribe of overcompensated bottom-feeders pronounces that "the King has Arrived!" in a voice loud enough to be heard by his fellow Housing Association zombies just makes him easier to hate. 

I'd like to know who that girl wearing the red warmup suit and holding a cell phone is in the next unboxing scene-- she doesn't look a thing like the guy doing the unboxing OR the woman implied to be his wife.  The live-in nanny and future Trophy Wife, I'm guessing.  And now I'm just creeped out and sad.

That we are introduced to his offspring (who looks to be about five years older than her future Weekend Mommy) who also behaves as if she is getting a good night's sleep for the first time ever because while buying up every material possession imaginable ChildMommy and Daddy forgot to arrange Proper Bedding doesn't make me any more sympathetic or appreciative of the Relief that has finally come to them in the form of several thousand dollars worth of Casper Mattresses (the kings-sized Wave Mattress celebrated in the opening scene retails for $1495 on the official site.  That's just for the mattress.)

So I'm just left wondering why I spent so much time on a hot, sunny summer day analyzing a commercial for a product I can't afford being demonstrated by people I really wish would just die.  Oh, right- because the flies are really biting today.  That's it.


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