Monday, July 4, 2011

Yep, Old Navy went there. Shall we follow?

My faith in human nature is restored just a little bit (not too much, don't worry) by the reaction the YouTubers are giving to this insulting, nasty little overdose of poetic license from Old Navy. Almost universally, the idiots who usually confine their comments to "LOL!" and "I KNOW THE KID IN THS COMMERSHAL HES IN MY CLASS" and "What song is this?" express outrage at Old Navy's hijacking of "Our Country, 'Tis of Thee" to be used in the service of announcing some sale.

But I imagine that unless Old Navy is overwhelmed with angry calls and possibly a boycott, this is the harbinger of bigger offenses to come. So get ready for "Oh Say Can You See, by the glow of Bud Lite....." and worse. Because shame died a quiet death some time ago, and nothing, absolutely nothing is sacred. Heck, maybe even God Bless America- the song I won't stand for, and I don't give a damn how many angry stares I get- will be appropriated for use in selling Tacos, Cars, or Auto Insurance.

Actually, though- would that be so bad? Man, I hate that song. And at least if it was turned into an offensive commercial jingle, it might not be seen as an appropriate way to inject a little faux patriotism into perfectly innocent Major League Baseball games.


  1. I've looked at the comments myself; sadly, you were right about it not being UNIVERSALLY condemned. I can't help but wonder what sort of miracle it'd take to get the more indulgent how low these idiots have sunk.

  2. I don't know what's so bad about GBA, but I concur that this ad is a childish prank played on the melody of God Save the Queen. Perhaps that could have become Bob - Save on Jeans. However, since the song isn't an actual anthem here (and is, more accurately, a melody from a Haydn string quartet), there's not much harm done, except to Old Navy's stellar reputation in marketing top, top quality shmatehs made from recycled shoe shine cloth.

  3. My principle objection to GBA is that it's a product of 9/11, as MLB and especially the Yankees, who play it at EVERY 7th inning stretch) decided that an additional dose of forced "patriotism" was needed. Also, that the song is treated with the same deference as the National Anthem- we are asked to rise, remove our caps, and stand at attention for another song. I hate the way people just followed along with this. I think we are one bombing away from being asked to stand at attention for Toby Keith. And to expect nasty glares and mutterings if we don't.

  4. That clarifies it.
    Interestingly (and for reasons I didn't fully understand at the time), I bought a copy of the Kate Smith 45 which was still, unbelievably in print, in August of 2001, only yards away from what we crassly call Ground Zero. I was practically freaked out that this very recording suddenly was appearing on Power 95 every 15 minutes. To me, the stand-for-any-reference-to-the-A-word is just another symptom of bad taste. Standing for an ASCAP song is plainly weird, although songs can become patriotic hymns (like two of Cohan's songs). America the Beautiful should suffice as our anthem - considering the embarrassing gaphs by nearly everyone, post Robert Merrill, who have attempted our current German drinking song, pre-game. I wouldn't stand for it either.

  5. My vote for National Anthem goes to "This Land Is Our Land." It would never happen though, because it's too blatantly pro-worker and FOXtards would claim "this land was made for you and me" is MARXIST.

  6. Why not "Blowin' in the Wind", then, or "We Shall Overcome"?
    Great songs, but the anthem should cut across the board in its appreciation for the country and its beauty. It should be dignified. It should not stand for battle-readiness and resisting-the-hated-British as the current one does.
    Actually, "These Boots were Made for Walkin'" would state our current stance.

  7. Just remember that before this we had "Yankee Doodle" as our anthem.
    Also, "this Land is your land" is too folksy. We need something soldiers can salute, something to proclaim strength, not some strummy tune no one will take seriosly.
    I say we keep the words, and have John Williams write us a better song. Because if I have to hear Christina Arugula ("That's too blonde, Bob!)or anyone else sing this really- hard-to-sing-moose-call, badly...
    That game had some WEIRD entertainment. halfway through they brought out Fergie Furry-Throat and the Overrated Peas, who used very obvious auto-tune, and roughly 1,000 Tron charater wannabes doing Bad 80s Aerobics to hide their singing. Wow, that was bad.

  8. I don't think the National Anthem should be designed based on a "need" for the soldiers to have something to salute, and I think we've had more than enough of this country "proclaiming strength." As for taking it seriously, almost any song would be an improvement over the one we have now.

    I disagree about keeping the words- the story of one particular engagement during one particular war that 80 percent of Americans probably have no idea even happened was never all that compelling. We were hardly "the Land of the Free" at the time, with most of our black population in bondage and women as second-class citizens with few rights of their own.

    And one more big advantage to "this Land is your Land"- it's hard to imagine a barbershop quartet being asked to sing it at a baseball game. It's a positive, optimistic song which celebrates our beauty, not our military might, and suggests that our strength and pride comes from our unity as a people, not rockets and bombs.