Thursday, February 27, 2014

For the first five seconds of this ad, I thought "focus" meant "extreme nearsightedness"

According to Five-Hour Energy what, exactly, is "focus?"

It's bringing your A-game.  It's taking it to the paint, and leaving nothing on the field.  It's giving it all you've got- 110 percent.  It's going All Out, and putting it all on the line.  It's Bringing It.  It's being Up to the Challenge, Not Backing Down, Kicking Butt and Taking Names.

In short, it's being able to bleat every hackneyed cliche ever invented and jamming it into a 30-second ad for caffeine-laden syrup which is totally unnecessary for anyone who eats a decent, balanced diet and gets regular exercise.

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