Friday, April 22, 2011
Big House, No Life
What is this guy's deal, exactly? I mean, he seems completely incapable of watching this stupid, violent, immature nub of a movie (or is it a video game? I really don't care) for more than a few seconds at a time without pausing the "action" and moving to another room- why? He doesn't actually DO anything at his new location, except lean up against a chair to continue watching what I guess are robots pound the crap out of each other. I can't see any purpose at all for his constant moving around, unless it's to indulge his Restless Leg Syndrome.
And why would anyone want to pause the "action" in this film anyway? It's just the same crap over and over again- two robots (?- again, don't mistake me for someone searching for information here, I really don't care) smashing each other and everything in sight- what does this guy think he's going to miss if he just lets the damn mess play itself out? Hey buddy- this ain't exactly James Mason reciting Shakespeare. The idea that he's actually concerned he's going to miss one moment of this pointless violence is kind of disturbing.
And here's the best part- when he pauses this drivel for the last time, he heads upstairs to his bedroom and hits the play button- and there's this girl right there, in bed, behind him as he sits his zombie ass down (blocking her view of the tv) for what we can only suspect is another six seconds of viewing before he gets up and moves on to the next room. This means that he's got the movie on every screen in the house, including the one this girl has been watching- and he's been pausing it, again and again, with total disregard for the fact that this girl has been watching the loud mess all along? Talk about asserting one's dominance over the house- "I've got the remote, baby. And this is what I want to watch, and I'll pause it when it conveniences me. You don't like it? Well, who the hell asked you?"
Anyone else get the sense that A) if this guy had twenty televisions in twenty separate rooms, he would never stop strolling around and hitting those "pause" and "play" buttons, B) that remote is symbolic of this guy's determination to control everything that goes on in his house, and C) the relationship between this guy and the blurry afterthought of a woman in the background needs some serious work that can only get underway when this guy finally finds the OFF button?
Meahwhile- hey, buddy? This is what they mean when they talk about abusing technology. Just because you CAN pause films constantly and then resume watching in other rooms doesn't mean you HAVE to. Maybe it's NOT all that necessary for your home to consume more energy than your average small town just so you can keep watching robots throw themselves around as you stroll about your suburban palace. Just a thought.