Saturday, September 3, 2011

AT&T Ramps up the Hate

Come now- in real life, the woman in this ad is clearly miserable in her loveless sham of a marriage, and is looking for a reason- ANY reason- to bail. When her husband sticks his head into the greenhouse (could this be their personal arboretum? If so, is this woman really complaining about her husband wasting money?) to announce that he's just signed the family up for some great AT&T offer, she looks as if she's totally reached the end of the rope with this guy and his insane spending habits.

"I should have married John Clark" she mutters, loudly enough for her husband to hear. Instead of doing the sensible thing- telling her to go ahead and call a lawyer, get a divorce, and start preparing to spend the rest of her life making John Clark the most miserable man on the planet- her husband replies that the service is free, provided when he signed the family up for unlimited messaging (which the family obviously needs- you certainly never want the kids to stop messaging, ever.)

At this point, if I were this woman (and I thank my merciful God that I am not) I would have asked the question I think is kind of obvious- "well, Steve, how much does UNLIMITED MESSAGING cost?" Or how about starting with "don't you think we could have talked about this before you went out and signed us up- maybe I we don't WANT our kids glued to their fucking phones 24/7? Are we an actual functioning family, or what?" Instead, Wife is stunned to discover that Steve has, perhaps, avoided being a Complete and Utter Screw-Up, For Once.

I'm pretty used to cell phone commercials dripping with hate and contempt for human beings and society at large, but AT&T takes it to a new level here. As usual, there's nobody to sympathize with- idiot Husband made a rather important decision concerning the family's cell phone usage without consulting Wife. Wife made a bitter, nasty, and cruel comment in return before knowing all the facts. And all we, the viewers, are left with is the hope that these guys stay married forever, because really, this is damage that ought to be contained, and I think they deserve each other.

I THINK so. I'm not QUITE sure anyone deserves this woman. If I were John Clark, I'd change my name and cell phone number.


  1. They should fire the ad reps that came up with this horrible commercial!

  2. You mentioned about cell phone companies producing ads that are dripping with contempt for mankind. I submit that this wasn't always the case.

    I remember when I was in elementary school, I was really inspired by the "You Will" AT&T ads back in 1993. They were dripping with optimism, and a lot of the prediction within the ads came true (though, perhaps not quite as rosy as they portrayed it). Even so, I often believe that the ads are a very general reflection of our society. Maybe if our society is less jaded about committed relationships, we will see more positive ads on that matter.

    I found a YouTube video that is a compilation of all seven "You Will" AT&T commercials from the 90s. Enjoy. :)

  3. Maybe you already know this but FYI -- Consumer Reports has this one on their absolute worst ad commercial category (ending Sunday, Oct 16th).

  4. This is a form of domestic verbal abuse and I can not believe ATT actually condones this!!! Thats it ATT support abuse. :(