Sunday, September 11, 2011
Now THAT'S Sarcasm!
Wait...the woman "presenting" Pillsbury Crescent Dogs (we of the great unwashed refer to them as "Pigs in a Blanket," and remember thinking that they were fun to eat- when we were around nine years old) at what appears to be an otherwise rather high-class function doesn't REALLY think the "impressive" comment by one of her guests was sincere, does she??
And does anyone else think that the last step to preparing and presenting "Pillsbury Crescent Dogs" at a party in which everyone is dressed to the nines* should really be to slap oneself on the forehead and mutter "oh jesus, what was I thinking?" before dumping the tray of junk into the nearest garbage disposal?
Come to think of it, it's hard for me to imagine an occasion where serving Pillsbury Crescent Dogs is at all appropriate. Let's see- when the only other option is that half-bag of frozen pizza rolls? When the neighbors you absolutely can't stand just rudely stopped in for an unannounced visit to discuss their plans to build a 7-11 franchise where their garage currently sits? When your husband- who PROMISED to make dinner because you had to work a double shift and it was his day off- reneged, and when you came home you found him sitting at the kitchen table, napkin tucked under his chin, with a fork in his hand?
Maybe. But a swanky holiday party? Please. Hey obtuse lady- when your guest said "Impressive," she was making fun of you. And when, for the next several weeks, you hear your friends muttering about those Pillsbury Crescent Dogs you served at your party, they aren't marveling at your inventiveness.** Get a clue. And a recipe book. And a Class Transplant.
*Upon further review, I see a guy in the background wearing an untucked, short-sleeved shirt. But let's be fair- these days, that's "dressed to the nines" for a twentysomething American male.
**And when they were raving at your Oreos and Whipped Cream Hors d'ouevres? Same thing.