Friday, February 25, 2011

Ok, tell me that this little pile of nothing is a "successful" ad



Two worthless dicks who can't be bothered to keep their suburban land monster on the highway or streets instead drive the damn thing into the middle of the desert, dress themselves as Indiana Jones wannabees, and spend a day trampling over wildlife in the desert. Lovely.

And the hi-LARIOUS punchline comes when these jerks can't find where they parked their Subaru Outback, no matter how many times they shatter the peace and quiet of the desert by pushing the "lock" button on the key remote (I'm sure that all hikers in the area appreciate the little reminder of suburbia, assholes. But just in case, don't forget to crank down the windows and blast your favorite "music" as you exit nature and make your way over to the Golden Corral for a few hours of "comfort food" after your day of stepping on lizards and poaching cacti.)

Of course, the showroom-shiny SUV (yeah, it looks like it's been sitting in the middle of the Mohave for hours. Of course it does) is sitting right behind that rock. Of course, the two glue-sniffers can't find it because...well, because they are really, really stupid. They've got this $30,000 SUV, but I've got an $80 wrist GPS- guess which one of us going to find our car?

I have two suggestions for Subaru- first, stop being so cheap with your ads. I'm sure these two "actors" earned next to nothing, but really, Paul Hogan is probably still available for not much more. Second, please give us the Conclusion to this "funny" slice of life- I'm thinking bleached bones, being picked at by vultures.

But that's the same suggestion I gave to the music industry when I was harassed with the video for Shania Twain's "That Don't Impress Me Much." They didn't listen, either. So I'll just finish up by pointing out to Subaru that every single comment on this video posted on YouTube refers not to the car being advertised, but to the stupid song in the background. Well done, Subaru- you've created a demand. For a stupid song.

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