Sunday, December 4, 2011

And don't even get me started on Al Sharpton....

I don't know about you, but as far as I'm concerned, there's nothing quite so satisfying as being lectured and talked down to by multimillionaire tv yakkers who make a living pretending to be "Progressives."

1. Chris Matthews: Recovering cheerleader for the Iraq War Chris Matthews. "Bush looks awesome on that flight suit" Chris Matthews. Romney's "shoulders you could land a jet on" Chris Matthews. "Tingle down my leg" Chris Matthews. The Chris Matthews who never, EVER lets anyone he is interviewing finish answering a question or expressing a thought, because can't disguise the fact that he really isn't interested in what anyone else thinks or is saying, ever. The Chris Matthews who makes bucket loads of money to blather about how much "fun" it would be to have a "brokered convention" and wax poetic about "tough Irish kids and tough Italian kids playing stick ball on the streets of Brooklyn" (don't ask.) The Chris Matthews who mysteriously remembers stuff that happened before he was born, and who provides deep insight into events which occurred when he was a child with the authority of a guy who was in the room. The guy we wish had really run for the Senate in 2010, because no one in this country needs an ego smackdown more. That Chris Matthews.

2. Ed Schultz. He of the ridiculously fake, forced laugh who, when not pontificating on how great it is to be "just one of the folk," will occasionally lapse into fond memories of his $3900 first class flight to a private airfield in Minnesota "to do a little fishin'." The guy who used to suck up to "Progressive" Senator Kent Conrad one minute, and bash Progressive Senator Al Franken the next. The guy who acts like a drunken Huey Long wannabee whenever he does his show in front of a live audience. The guy who once strongly considered a run for Congress from North Dakota- as a Conservative Republican. That Ed Schultz.

3. Rachel Maddow- the brightest bulb of the lot, and probably the closest to being a sincere Progressive, but still a pedantic, ponderous, plodding, squeaky, finger-wagging schoolmarm who seems eternally convinced that her audience consists of nine year old kids who Won't Ever Quite Get It unless she dazzles them with cutesy props and spells out the subject very. Very. Slowly. The Rachel Maddow who eventually will admit that the "Moment of Geek" segment of her show might as well be called "See, Rachel Maddow's store of knowledge is vastly larger than yours and goes way beyond politics!," just as on her old radio show she finally admitted that the segment entitled "Ask Dr Maddow" could have been retitled "Ask Dr Maddow to look up something on Wikipedia for you." That Rachel Maddow.

Hey, guys? Tell you what- when you stop pretending that the Occupy Wall Street movement is somehow aimed entirely at the Republican party and is ideologically in sync with the Democrats, when you stop trying to convince me that the President and the Democratic Party represents the future of Progressivism and aren't every bit the Corporatists that the Republicans are, and when you stop cashing those checks written out to you by "Progressive" General Electric, I might start taking you a bit more seriously.

Until then, save the overbearing ego-stroking ads for "Morning Joe," ok?*

*The AM offering from Progressive MSNBC, which will probably get it's own post here, eventually.


  1. Excellent post. Maddow is the only one who is progressive and borders on being an intellectual heavyweight, but her pedantic style borders on condescending.

    Matthews goes with the political winds. If Republicans are in power, Matthews acts contemptuous of Democrats. If Democrats are in power, Matthews reminds us that he used to work for Tip O'Neill.

    Schultz goes with the dollars. If he could have made money as a conservative commentator, he'd be conservative.

    Sharpton? I'm STILL waiting for him to apologize to Steve Pagones and Harry Crist, Jr.

  2. I'm quite certain that Schultz looked at the political landscape a dozen years ago, saw that there was simply no room for another big right-wing radio yakker in a format already dominated by Limbaugh, Hannity, Beck, Liddy, etc., and aimed to fill the vacuum of Liberal Talk.

    As for Matthews, he stopped being relevant by the end of the 90s. Disappointed office-seeker paid to snark on people who achieved where he failed. I'd ask why he's still around, but what's the point in a world where George Will and Bob Schieffer can still pick up paychecks.

  3. It's times like this that I miss the total WTF factor of the Gravel campaign; it would be far better to try to figure out what Creepy Old Guy meant by staring at us and throwing a rock into a pond than enduring this mush.