Saturday, December 3, 2011

There are no winners here

It would take way too long- time I simply don't have- to go through this truly awful, mind-numbing pile of steaming dreck line by wretched line. It would be almost as painful to describe the main characters- scruffy, hopelessly addicted, desperately trying to keep up with each other hipster doofus wannabees. Everyone in this ad is so utterly loathsome, so pretentious, so utterly devoid of the traits we generally use to describe the human condition, that to watch this thing the four or five times I would need to get a good snark going- well, you know what? Some things are simply not worth it.

I'll just note that none of these monsters dressed in human disguise seem to have anything better to do with their time but spend hour after hour waiting in line for the Next Big Thing. Are they unemployed or self-employed? Are they "living" with their parents (the word "living" used very loosely here?) Did they just call in sick so that they could blow a day in front of their favorite electronics store, getting an upgraded phone Just Because?

And I'll also note the deceptive, hypocritical tone of this ad- the people who made it are clearly making fun of these warm bags of moving refuse, and yet...are also trying to sell us a phone based on it's Cool Big Screen and 4G capability. The joke seems to me that you don't have to stand in line to get one of these Samsung phones, which are every bit as good as the latest I Phone or whatever these ugly morons are devoting a day to snatch up. Not that being obsessed with junk like this is stupid- it's just stupid to stand in line for it.

I think the bottom line is that there never seems to be an 85-year old man in a pickup truck mistaking his accelerator for the brake pedal when you need one.


  1. There also never seems to be anyone in these ads who might use these gizmos for any useful purpose; the phrase 'wasting prodigious means on mean ends' keeps coming to mind when seeing ads like this.

  2. Oh. My. Word. Do they have any idea they're mocking themselves? You know, people who are so hung up on having The Latest Thing, who are the only ones who are going to give a crap about this commercial? *rolls eyes* I agree, there's so much crap here you'd be all day and three or four blog entries taking it all apart.