Wednesday, December 7, 2011

What's really sick is, this has probably already happened in real life

These people are cooing and giggling over a live video of a baby which appears on a laptop screen. They are passing around that laptop as if it's a real baby. This is supposed to be cute and funny on some level. Instead it leaves us wanting all of them to put that damned thing down and just look at the screen as a group- so we can slap them upside the head, hard, without damaging the computer.

The Designated Flummoxed Male in this ad is just standing there with a clueless, confused look on his face- and for a moment, we can engage in the fantasy that he's the only person with two brain cells to rub together here, and has no interest in playing this stupid Pass the Laptop Game. For a moment, we can pretend that look on his face means "what the hell are you idiots doing?" or "Oh my God I am related to you scary morons?" Ah, but only for a moment- then we realize that he's just Being A Guy, and part of Being A Guy means Being Afraid Of Holding A Baby. Because why would a guy want to hold a baby, or have any idea how to? What do guys have to do with the creation of babies, right?

Anyway, this stupid, mercifully short little nub of an ad just makes me angry at Windows, because it joins so many other commercials in suggesting that technology doesn't really enhance our lives; it just makes us act like really, really pathetic morons. Except for the Guy- it can't change him, because he is a pathetic moron already. Because he is a Guy. See, technology doesn't have the power to change EVERYTHING.


  1. I never understood the Musical Baby Game when it happened in real life. Who wants to pass a fresh-out-of-the-box baby without its own immune system around a room of strangers who have all been hacking into their hands, picking their noses, and not washing after going to the bathroom.

    This... makes even less sense.

    I think Awkward Guy should have dropped the laptop. That would have been hilarious.

  2. Not only does the whole 'Let's give a vulnerable newborn a horrible disease to show our love' thing baffle me, I am not sure that we should subject said child to having to look at adult faces that quickly. Remember, their brains are still forming so having to look at the unfortunate results of day-to-day life could give them a complex.

  3. I hadn't even considered that, Dreaded- I forgot that this means this poor baby is seeing all these stupid faces flashing in front of him in quick succession- not a good idea. Plus, this kid has plenty of time to figure out that he's related to a group of stupid, worthless chunks of dumb- why rush it?

  4. *yawns* I'm a female who wants kids and loves babies and cute baby pictures, and this commercial left me feeling nonplussed. Okay, the baby's on screen and it's sleeping. And? What's to be excited over? The Stereotypical Guy thing made me roll my eyes and it brassed me off when the baby 'coincidentally' started to cry just when the guy was looking at the screen (because the woman holding the laptop wouldn't just go away and leave them the frag alone). Yeah, yeah, yeah, SOOOOOOOO funny! NOT! More than a few women are like that about baby pictures and there are plenty of guys who turn to mush over baby pics. How about showing a mixed group with a variety of reactions from both genders? Or does thinking of that require more brain cells and creativity than most marketing people possess?

  5. Nope, sorry. Babies and women mix, babies and men do not. It's in the Television Bible, I think.