Saturday, September 15, 2012
Another As Seen On TV Solution-- to a Problem I was Unaware Of
I've lived on this Earth for quite a few years (how many? None of your damn business! Fewer than you'd guess, to look at me, I can promise you that!) but I have to confess, I've never heard of these things called "Skin Tags." Did they used to be called something else?
I've seen a lot of naked people too (not as many as I'd like- but that's none of your business either! I've got a full schedule, and I've been in a bit of a dry spell lately-- like since the 90s- but it could happen to anyone, so back off, ok?) but I've never seen one of these Skin Tag things, either.
So what's the deal? Is "extra" skin a common problem I have somehow manage to avoid experiencing, seeing or even ever hearing of? I'm a pretty worldly guy- how could something as simple and blatant as "Skin Tags" get past me? Do I just need to get out more?
And if "Skin Tags" are so common, do I WANT to get out more?
By the way, is the endorsement from the American Homeopathic Institute For Not Actual Medicine or whatever that was Hysterical, or what? I mean, that made the whole commercial worth viewing. Well, almost.
Skin Tags. Really? Sigh. Ok, I guess I really do need to mix more with my fellow humans. When they aren't wearing clothes. Next thing you know, I'll be seeing ads for Extra Elbow Removal Products, like that Digit-Off stuff Victoria Jackson used to peddle on a Saturday Night Live Parody commercial. And everyone watching will know someone with the problem being addressed- except me.
(BTW- If "extra skin" is a genetic defect, why hasn't KFC managed to isolate the gene causing it, and inject it into it's chickens? Because knowing my fellow Americans, I'm sure "Extra Skin" would be a huge selling point at everybody's favorite Buckets and Buckets of Fried Chicken Parts restaurant.)