Thursday, September 26, 2013
Obsessing over your house while on vacation is the Future of Awesome?
Why does everyone in these Xfinity commercials live in a house with a glowing white interior?
And am I the only person on the planet who doesn't think about his house while on vacation? I leave my house totally unattended for two months every summer, and for several weeks during the year. It's vacant for ten hours a day. And I can honestly say that over the course of a year I don't spend five minutes wondering if anyone has broken in to lay on my couch and watch my television, what the temperature is, or if a freaking pelican has wandered in (to lay on my couch and watch television, or do anything else.) For some reason, I've always just assumed that my house will take care of itself while I'm not in it, and not fall prey to burglars or dogs or pelicans.
I suppose if I had this "awesome" thing from Xfinity (and a tablet,) I'd be checking up on the place every hour on the hour, like the stupid dick in this commercial who has decided that it's a great way to pretend not to have time to spend with his wife and kids on the beach. Seriously, if I was this guy's wife I'd be chucking that damn thing into the surf and telling him to get off his ass and spend time with his family, you clueless techno-addled jagoff.
I'd also tell him that I don't give a flying damn what the temperature is in the freaking house while we are on the beach. And if he reaches for his iPhone to activate his Xfinity Home Security App, it's going to join his precious tablet in the surf.