Sunday, September 1, 2013
Never mind a new phone; what this guy really needs is a better grade of friends
Or maybe just a hammer to smash the smarmy dick he's sitting with in the face.
I really don't know why the narrator for this steaming pile of cow dung doesn't just use the pitch line "just upgrade your phone every time you meet someone with a slightly better one, because you are a pathetic, spineless, soulless moron whose entire self-worth depends on how someone with a Please Punch Me beard views your phone."
I also don't know why any actual adult would fall for this crap. I wish the Crestfallen-for-No-Reason loser who stars in all these "Upgrade every five minutes just because" ads would just reply "my phone works fine, and only a severely damaged douchenozzle or an eight-year old boy would feel threatened by someone with an allegedly 'better' phone." Or, if he wanted to be extra snarky, he could go with "does having a phone two months younger than mine really compensate for the fact that you have no hair?"
Actually, I wish he would just pick up a chair and brain him with it. Because there's never a hammer available when you really need one, is there?