Wednesday, September 4, 2013

Questions I'd like to Ask Jan



Dear Toyota Lunatic,

What the hell are you on?

Did you ever want more than this?  I mean, you act like you've achieved the dream of a lifetime, sitting behind a desk at a Toyota dealership waiting to respond with a chirpy "Hi I'm Jan" to every idiot who walks in the door?  When you were voted Miss Congeniality in High School, did they tell you that this was the kind of career you had waiting for you- spokeschoad for a stupid car company in a bunch of stupid commercials in an ad campaign which will not be missed for one moment when it ends?

If you are such a great people person, why aren't you actually selling cars instead of basically performing the same job as an elderly Wal Mart greeter?  Why are you the person the Guys come to when they are looking for a fork?  (What kind of bs sexist crap is that, anyway?  Is it because you are the "Girl" working at this Toyota Dealership, and finding utensils for the Guys is just what Girls do?)

Come to think of it, why aren't you putting your awesomely bubbly people skills to work negotiating hostage situations or talking depressed citizens off of ledges?

Do they ever let you stand up?  And if they do, are you wearing pants?

PS- "See more of Jan?"  Um, pass.


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