Friday, February 10, 2012
You think DEPRESSION hurts? Try Cymbalta!
First- Sadness? Loss of Interest? Anxiety? These are the symptoms of Depression? Jeesh, who ISN'T depressed?
Second- I have seen a lot of commercials for anti-Depressant medications, but this is the first one I've ever seen which lists "yellowing of eyes" as a possible side effect. Suicidal thoughts? Check. Insomnia? Check. Bleeding out like a stuck pig? Check. But yellowing of eyes? Sorry, that's the deal breaker for me. My eyes are my meal ticket!
They are also the windows to my soul. I can't have those windows anything but rich brown- so I guess I'll have to stay depressed. I don't even have to ask my doctor of Cymbalta is Right for Me. Ulcers, severe stomach cramps, deafness, vomiting, paranoia, delusions, hallucinations, sudden irrational fear of sock puppets- I can learn to adjust to pretty much anything. But leave my eyes alone, Cymbalta!
By the way, I see that Cymbalta isn't recommended for Children under 18. What do children over 18 look like? Let me guess- they spend most of their time texting, downloading the newest version of Angry Birds and playing Call of Duty in their basements, right?