Monday, July 2, 2012
It makes actual human contact obsolete. Just say it already, Samsung
Sick. Just Sick.
This phone "knows you." Yes, better than you know yourself, I bet. Certainly, better than anyone else knows you- especially if you've already turned into a socially isolated, techno-obsessed little fleeb. Human beings don't know you, except perhaps as Facebook Friend #1346 or someone they follow on Twitter Just Because. But none of that matters. Because your phone knows you.
"Knows your every move." Ugh, now we've added a healthy dose of Creepy to our already overflowing plate of Sick. Yes, your phone learns all about you by keeping track of your usage patterns. So it can eventually anticipate what you are going to text, who you are going to call, and where are you going to go. In other words, it's the Big Brother you carry around in your hand. The Big Brother which will eventually realize it's much smarter than you are (not the highest hurdle, I admit,) does not really need you or imput, and orders SkyNet to launch every missile in its arsenal.
And can someone explain to me the grotesque phone-to-phone "contact" with the people separated by the transparent plastic divider? I've already used Sick and Creepy- can I just go with "weird" here? They "touch" palms. They "touch" phones. I feel there is something very disturbing going on here. Are they "sharing" (man has THAT word been ruined by modern technology?) Why doesn't Idiot 1 just send Idiot 2 the image? What the fuck is WITH these people?
At this point, the Morons Acting Like Morons At The Wedding is almost a welcome relief. Mugging for the camera, having the image sent to a thousand people, 998 of whom couldn't give a damn and will be deleting it five seconds later- this, I know how to deal with.
But the rest of this ugly, revolting cell phone worshiping Minute of Hate? Please, spare me. People who act like this are disturbed. Companies that peddle this kind of behavior as somehow within the realm of "normal" are complicit in the destruction of society. And anyone who thinks that there's something attractive about devices which replace actual human contact with the Cult of Connectivity and Sharing- well, I feel sorry for you. Almost as much as I wish you would just fall off the face of the Earth already.