Sunday, November 2, 2014

"I'm here to say yes to whatever you offer me."

The guy in this stupid ad has no idea what a "gig" is, but thinks he's getting a great deal because the amount he "gets" per month is doubled if he takes this girl's offer.  Rather than simply admit he has no idea what a "gig" is, he'll take the offer because $160 a month is a fair price to pay rather than just tell a total stranger you have no idea you know what she's talking about.  If you've got the money, I guess.*

Because he can't think of an actual pick-up line, he decides that this girl is offering him a great deal because he's a celebrity ( I have no idea who he is and no, I don't care.)

"We are just talking loudly for some reason."  Probably the same reason you are standing in the middle of a virtually-empty store discussing gigs instead of acting like every single employee and customer I've ever seen in every actual AT&T store I've ever been in- employee behind the counter, customer on the other side of the counter, store crowded and noisy with frustrated people wandering around waiting for their turn to be assisted (their place on line being displayed on a monitor.)  If I ever walked into one of these stores and was actually greeted by someone like the people in these ads always are, I think I'd faint.

*In another one of these awful ads- which I don't think I'll bother giving it's own roasting- this woman reads the mind of the hipster doofus who saunters in- "yes, we have the new iPhone."  The customer is stunned that she knows what he came in for, which is kind of like being stunned that Red wants to get lunch at Wendy's.  "I knew you came in for the new iPhone because evey witless zombie with money burning holes in his pocket wants the new iPhone.  Why should you be any different?"

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