Saturday, November 29, 2014
The North Pole would love to provide a health care plan, but the boss's daughter wants a new Lexus, so....
Ok, as near as I can figure it, the guy in this ad (who bears a striking resemblence to Santa Claus) works hard in a brutal sweatshop in some Northern climate (Siberia?) doing work which has become automated in most of the civilized world. (I'm not actually sure that giant wheels have been turned by humans since the 15th century- outside of a Conan The Barbarian movie, that is.)
Anyway, this fat bearded guy is so ungrateful for the job some benevolent factory owner "gave" him that he's constantly pulling this whiny "oh my poor back" bit, until every other employee on the floor gets it, your back hurts, oh boo hoo Don't You Know There Are People Who Don't Have Any Jobs At All Get Back To Your Wheel.*
Finally, three ghosts visit the factory owner (they find him at his winter palace in Vail) and convince him that he's being too hard on his employees (especially the elderly ones with bad taste in clothes.) So he decided that yes, it's time to provide a health care plan. Thus, the bottle of Aleve.
Did I figure this right?
*Are we supposed to find it heartwarming that Santa pops a pill and gets right back to cranking out crap for spoiled kids? I have a better idea for an old man who is doing work which is causing him constant pain- STOP DOING THAT WORK. And a bottle of Aleve? F--K THAT! Fill out a Worker's Comp form and get an attorney!