Thursday, August 9, 2012

AM,'s intensely annoying no matter what time of day it is

Because we can never get quite enough of these "clever" commercials featuring noise which is supposed to sound like music, can we?

Be it potato chips, Kit Kat Bars, or soda fountains, there is simply nothing more attention-grabbing than hearing scruffy dopes create "music" with intensely annoying sounds, is there?

And never mind that the first time anyone attempts to replicate what these idiots are doing- at AMPM* or anywhere else, that person will be politely asked to exit the store and not come back.  Or that the employees of AMPM no doubt cringe whenever they see this ad, knowing that the knuckle-dragging zombies who stumble into the convenience store to trade in their meager wages for watery soda, beef jerky, cigarettes and lottery tickets have just been given permission by Corporate to try mixing several different types of soda in the same cup, no doubt leaving a liquid mess at the fountain every twelve minutes or so.

Too bad for them.  Because this concept is so original, so ear-catching, and so addictive that it's certain to be a massive hit for whatever billion-dollar industry happens to be holding on to AMPM as a tax shelter this month.  Especially since you can get "actors" on the cheap if you don't give them any lines.  My guess is that these particular idiots are being paid in Doritos and Face Time.

*Saw this commercial while watching an Oakland-LA game on tv, so I'm guessing AMPM is the West Coast's answer to Cumberland Farms, Stewart's, and 7-11.


  1. Quite a few of the people in my family work in the service industry and are annoyed by the idiots who imitate what they see in the ads so the premise of this post is quite valid.

  2. I will never, in my entire life, understand the appeal to advertisers of this "Chinese water torture" form of advertising.

    The one thing this commercial is missing is the robber holding up the register, who then looks at those two morons before pointing his gun at them and shooting them dead. He turns back to see a grateful cashier, handing him the money with a smile on his face.

  3. I...have no words. 'Profoundly uncouth' doesn't begin to describe this commericial, and 'horrified and disgusted' don't cover my reaction.

  4. Actually, AM/PM is in the Midwest too. The convenience stores in BP gas stations are now all labeled AM/PM markets (at least in my neck of the woods). The idea for this ad is indeed pretty disgusting, although, as an ex-movie theater employee, I find it interesting that the mixing of fountain drinks as was commonly practiced by fountain-service enterprise employees (at least in cases where they were permitted free drinks as an employment perk) has been mainstreamed and extended to the public now that so many places offer self-serve fountains. Before I worked at the movies I had no idea what "Spoke" (combined Coke and Sprite) was, nor that it was so popular. But it was. This ad, however, leaves me with the impression that the guys in it are going to end up with something more approximating a huge garbagey mess...sort of like college "trashcan punch," only minus the alcohol that was the only reason people actually drank that stuff.